I thought I would begin my membership by adding to a forum that hasn't seen any traffic yet. Apologies to everyone who has already heard the joke. Sartre goes into a café, sits down, and begins reading his newspaper. A few moments later, a waiter comes to his table and asks: "Can I get you something sir?" Sartre looks up and replies: "Yes, a coffee please, no cream." To which the waiter replies: "Sorry sir, we are out of cream. If you like, I could bring you a coffee with no sugar."
Not a joke, but we were somewhere in Quebec on vacation when I was a boy, and at a mum and pup restaurant the parents asked for a cheese pizza, which they struggled to convey in French and were particular to point out cheese only and no other toppings, and we were served a crust with cheese, nothing more. A god-awful pizza, but if the oddball Yanks ask for "cheese only" that must mean no tomato sauce either ! Oh, Ms. Caniche royal abricot, on our way out of the pizza shop there was a beautiful lady dressed to kill with a pet cheetah on a sturdy chain leash. No birds were harmed by that cheetah! She and her pussy were part of a promotion of some sort, those sly Québécois are always up to something !
A Callidryas' joke reminded me of some of the old Russian Soviet jokes, which I find great. Here are a few I find amusing: A man walks into a shop and asks: "You don't have fish?" The answer: -"We don't have meat: we are butchers. The fish shop opposite doesn't have fish." Dad, can I have the car keys?" "OK, but don't lose them. We will get the car in only seven years!" A judge walks out of his chambers laughing his head off. A colleague approaches him and asks why he is laughing. "I just heard the funniest joke in the world!" "Well, go ahead, tell me!" says the other judge. "I can't – I just gave someone ten years for it!" This is Armenian Radio; our listeners asked us: “Is it possible to make ends meet on one salary alone?” We’re answering: “We don't know, we never tried.”
